The Temple of Yes
Where trusting yourself creates the intimacy and aliveness you desire.
An Intentionally Edgy Retreat for Individuals & Couples
October 15-18, 2026 | Austin, TX
There is an application and interview to join. No commitment necessary to apply.
Yes.
Imagine a place where you could be curious and desirous and experimental… without worrying if you’re being judged or going too far.
Where you could explore more of your erotic self:
More intimacy. More pleasure. More playfulness. More surrender.
Yes…
A place where you could take the time to figure out exactly what you want, without anyone rushing you, expecting something from you, or thinking you’re a weirdo.
While being solidly held and gently guided the whole way.
YES!
This is that place.
WELCOME TO THE TEMPLE OF YES
This isn’t just a retreat. This is a rewiring. A reclamation. A remembering that your desire is not a problem to solve. It’s a pulse to follow.
Somewhere along the way, most of us learned that our relational and erotic desires were too big, too much, or too shameful.
As a result, desire often became intertwined with fear, guilt, uncertainty...
So we learned to settle for “good enough,” accepting what we think we’re supposed to be happy with, instead of what we honestly desire. But behind closed doors, we reach for fantasy, like faerie smut or porn, to satisfy the desire. And it’s never enough.
At The Temple of Yes, we don't settle. We empower the electric pulse of desire that cracks your heart open and makes your toes curl.
Not by instantaneously giving you everything you crave, but by empowering you to claim your true Yes:
The energy that can re-enliven you after a hard day, a hard month, a hard year. The zing of possibility that will reinvigorate your body, your creativity, your relationships, your whole life.
Because we don’t just want you to have a good time with a consenting partner. We want you to have an epic relationship with your own erotic life force — cultivating it to be a source of endless expansion, truth, and fulfillment, in all aspects of your life.
At The Temple of Yes, we don’t rush. We slow things down so you can discover and own exactly what you want, and don’t want.
You can't have that kind of relationship with your Yes without an equally alive relationship with your No. Because No isn't a wall. It isn't the end of the conversation. It's the opening to a better one.
No more self-abandoning, compromising, and settling in relationships and erotic intimacy. Let’s discover what magic ignites when you are supported to be the most authentic, desirous, liberated version of yourself.
We curate this space intentionally, so we ask that you fill out a short application to help us get to know you, and then we’ll get on a Zoom to go deeper and ensure The Temple of Yes is the right fit.
Elizabeth, 2025 Participant
What the Temple of Yes is like, from people who have been there:
A little bit
spin the bottle…
Lisa, 2024 Participant
… with a lot of permission to own
your Yes and No
You Will Experience:
Embodiment Practices - Expand your capacity to feel and be with your Yes & No, as well as turn on, pleasure, fear, shame, disappointment, etc. so you can stay present in intense moments.
Connection Exercises - Cultivate language, frameworks, and tools for sharing and revealing your truth, so the things that have felt impossible to say become sayable with ease, and even play.
The Stages of Embodied Desire — Learn our signature five-stage framework that gives you a new relationship with your desire, so you’re not ruled by it or terrified of it, but brought alive by it.
Sensual Exploration Dojos - Explore receiving your desires and expressing your boundaries for platonic experiences in a no-pressure, fully consensual, supported space.
Sacred Self-Pleasure - Meet your own pleasure in reverence and celebration, in a space designed to feel safe, inclusive, unhurried and shame-free.
Sex-Positive Play Dojos - Explore real desire and real boundaries with others in an unfacilitated, trauma-informed, gently supported space. If ruptures arise, practice in-the-moment repair as a pathway toward greater clarity, trust, and intimacy, with support from facilitators.
Integration Circles - Reflect on each day's journey in a communal space of support: celebrating wins, meeting the tender parts, receiving guidance, and integrating discoveries.
Often people don’t know if this is the right choice until our call. Start the application process today.
“They create a container that makes it so safe to explore, even if you stepped in… scared out of your mind to do so.”
— Matt, 2025 Participant
At The Temple of Yes, there are no prerequisites.
You don't have to be “experienced.” You don't have to already know what you want.
You don't have to have a partner, or be looking for one, or want to engage with anyone intimately.
All you need is the curiosity to learn more about yourself and your desire.
CA, 2024 & 2025 Return Participant
What makes our space unique:
“I have spent a fair amount of time in… Tantra retreats, kink workshops, and so on. In those offerings, there’s an assumption, and likely an errant one, that participants know how to be in their body, and have access to their embodied Yes and No. It’s assumed that you show up already aware of your desires and your boundaries, and know how to communicate them to others…
And we all know that’s mostly bullsh*t.
At The Temple of Yes, you actually learn how to access the deep knowing in your body, practice sharing it with another human being, and experience all the confusion, heartbreak, and turn-on that entails.”
- WC, 2024 & 2025 Return Participant
You’ll Walk Away Able To:
Know What You Truly Want — Discover the freedom to want what you want without apology by understanding the deeper nourishment your desires are pointing toward.
Trust Your Body — Learn to distinguish thoughts, emotions, and body sensations (we call this "the weather report"), so you can feel your desires and boundaries, not just think about them. And they can arise from an inner knowing, instead of looking outward for permission or approval.
Prepare Your Nervous System for Intimacy — Explore how to resource yourself before asking your nervous system to open to another (we call this "precare"), discovering why connection, desire, and erotic play become far more available when they emerge from where you actually are.
Express Yourself Honestly — Share your desires, boundaries, fears, and needs without performing over, enduring beyond, or sacrificing your truth.
Co-Create From Shared Intention — With a partner, identify what your intimacy is in service of (“the north star”), so your hearts are in alignment as you explore different ways of connecting.
Navigate Conflicting Desires — Stay connected and curious when desires don't match, finding the deeper Yes beneath competing wants and transforming conflict from a dead end into a doorway.
Receive More Fully — Expand your capacity to receive pleasure, praise, love, turn-on, and even disappointment while staying grounded in your body.
Stay Connected When Things Get Messy — Discover how honesty, curiosity, and repair can transform conflict into a pathway toward deeper intimacy.
No commitment necessary to apply. Just curiosity.
Meet Your Facilitators
Nicholette Routhier
I was always a curious and kinky erotic being, but it took me a long time to learn that I could fully express my sexuality while honoring my Yes’s and No’s along the way. I thought that I was lucky if someone was into my brand of weird and I should just take what I got.
I explored many sex-positive spaces throughout early adulthood, but I didn't begin thriving in my full erotic expression until I started integrating spirituality and consciousness into my sexuality. That path led me to train extensively in consent education, repair practices, the shamanic lineage of Carlos Castaneda, and the spiritual intimacy & sexual polarity work of David Deida, John Wineland, and Kendra Cunov.
Today, I've found my way to a queer, ethical non-monogamous, 24/7 Dominant/submissive marriage where both my husband and I are fully seen and fully expressed.
I bring a lens of sovereignty, truth, and self-trust into everything I offer, helping people discover that they never have to abandon themselves in order to experience deep intimacy.
Kari Kinkead
My work is rooted in embodiment—breath, sound, and movement—as well as sexual yoga, kink, and ontological coaching. I also bring 18+ years of scientific knowledge as a nurse, offering a unique blend of expertise in the physical body, nervous system regulation, and altered states of consciousness.
I am in a deeply loving, stable, wildly passionate relationship where all of me is welcome. Where kink, tenderness, boundaries, and devotion all coexist.
My personal journey and now coaching revolve around un-shaming desire, reawakening the body, and letting pleasure and passion be a part of every area of life.
“Nicolette and Kari are approachable, relatable, human people, that are both creating and a part of a community… in an appropriately boundaried way.
So something that’s refreshing about this community is that it's very connective, and I feel easeful and connected with the facilitators.
— Jonah, 2024 & 2025 Participant & Assistant
A misconception about desire: you have to act on it to receive pleasure.
(Nope, not true!)
After hosting this retreat multiple times, we can tell you that one of the most moving, electric parts of the retreat is when participants are invited to claim desires they have never expressed — even if they have no intention of acting on those desires.
Everyone walks out of that session more alive, standing taller, laughing louder. It’s like an alchemical reaction happens: by reclaiming a disowned aspect of themselves, they’ve gotten some of their lifeforce back.
This is why we love this work, because you can watch people visibly change over the four days as they get more comfortable wanting what they want, out loud.
Coming alone?
Coming with a partner? Both are perfect.
If you're joining us on your own:
You will not be the odd one out, and you will not be left to figure it out alone. This is not a mixer where you’re expected to strike up conversations with strangers. Most of our time together is spent in guided, structured experiences, so you'll meet everyone without needing to force it, and get to know a variety of people more deeply each day — no awkward mingling, no pressure to pair off. And even during the unstructured time, the assistants often organize group activities (like prey & predator tag, cuddle puddles, and spin the bottle) and there is always the option to come sit and chat with Kari & Nicholette.
You also do not have to engage with anyone intimately to get everything this retreat offers; the most powerful work happens in your own body, and in expressing your Yes’s and No’s. Come as you are, single or partnered-at-home, hoping for intimacy or hoping for self discovery. This is a place to learn about yourself, enjoy yourself, and then bring your insights back home.
If you're joining us with a partner (or partners):
You choose how you show up together. We invite you to be a part of the group as we explore communication and embodiment practices, and then in the open play evenings, you're welcome to stay entirely with each other, or to explore more widely.
You’ll also have the structure and support to negotiate your shared boundaries throughout the retreat, so you don’t have to have it all figured out before you arrive. For a lot of couples, this becomes the safest space they've ever had to explore new desires and boundaries together — to say the things they've never felt ready to say, and find more love and connection through the conversations that follow.
Great! We love going one step at a time.
What Happens When You Bring Your True Desires to Your Partner:
“I was raised to believe that desire was selfish and it was the end of a conversation — ‘This is what I want, period.’
Instead, my partner and I now have this understanding of desire as a thing that opens the potential for more love.
So when you speak your desire, you’re not closing off the possibilities. It’s actually the opposite.”
- Leona, 2024 & 2025 Return Participant
What’s Included
October 15-18, 2026 | Austin, TX
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Four days in an intimate, curated, consent-based container of people who have been vetted for their integrity and readiness (See the application process below). Held from start to finish by two highly trained facilitators and a team of experienced assistants, so you can go as deep as you want, knowing someone’s got you.
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The support begins before you arrive and continues after you leave: a pre-retreat Zoom call to meet your facilitators & fellow participants and set your intentions, and a post-retreat integration call to ensure your re-entry is going smoothly and your insights are grounded into your daily life.
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While you're with us, you won’t have to think about anything but your own experience — allergy-friendly, catered meals from Thursday dinner through Sunday breakfast mean that while you’re on-site, you get to be present with the deep currents of desire and evolution rather than thinking about logistics.
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We also have a limited number of on-site accommodations available for an additional fee. These spots are popular for those who like to sleep in, or stay in the communal energy, but not always favored by people who want more of their own space to decompress. So we leave it up to you to decide which you prefer!
“Actual moments where I had acutal things came up with another participant… and [I] didn't know what to do, Nicolette would be with him and I would be with Kari — you actually get to work with them in the moment... It’s so helpful and invaluable… There's so much support and care.”
— Erin, 2024 & 2025 Participant
Investment & Registration
Early Registration
$1800 Individual | $3200 Couple
(application required)
Deadline: August 1st, 2026
If you're feeling the pull, reach out now. There is no commitment until after the application and discovery call.
Psst… this date has passed, but we’re offering a one-week grace period. So apply now!
General Registration
$2100 Individual | $3800 Couple
(application required)
Limited spots available. This is an intimate, high-touch container.
The Application Process
We curate this space intentionally so every person in the room has been vetted for integrity, openness, and readiness.
Begin with a short application, followed by a Zoom conversation with Kari or Nicholette to explore whether The Temple of Yes is the right fit.
This conversation goes both ways! Bring your questions, concerns, and nerve-citement — it’s all welcome.
There is no commitment throughout the application process. You can change your mind at any time.
Matt, 2025 Participant
What previous participants want you to know
Space is made for real conversations and repair here.
There’s so much love in the space, even when you make mistakes.
Erin, 2024 & 2025 Participant
You are building psychological & emotional safety with yourself.
Leona, 2024 & 2025 Participant
Schedule:
Before We Gather — Wednesday, October 7 · 6:30–8pm CDT
Pre-Retreat Zoom
A nervous-system-friendly way to begin building connections, so you arrive in Austin already feeling as if you're among friends and confidants.
Day One — Thursday, October 15 · Doors Open 12pm
We arrive, settle in, and open with orientation, retreat agreements, and the foundational principles that provide the structure and safety for the weekend. In the evening, you'll take your first curious, playful steps into sensual exploration.
Days Two & Three — Friday & Saturday, October 16–17
The heart of the retreat. Full days of facilitated exploration, embodied practice, workshops on desire, boundaries, and vulnerable communication. We go deeper as trust builds, with room to rest, integrate, and process anything crunchy along the way. These are the days (and nights) where you play and experiment, test out your new skills, and step more deeply into your erotic desires.
Day Four — Sunday, October 18 · Complete by 12pm
We close by honoring how far you've come, and gathering the insights you'll take home. There is also space for any unprocessed feelings to be felt. You leave in the early afternoon, to catch a flight or go swimming with new friends or nap in a bubble of satisfaction.
After We Part — Wednesday, October 28 · 6:30–8pm CDT
Post-Retreat Zoom
Because the expansion doesn’t end when the retreat ends. We gather once more to debrief, integrate, and help your discoveries root into your everyday life.
Frequently Asked Questions
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Our commitment is to a culture of safety, self-expression, and belonging. Adults of all ages 18+, genders, sexual orientations, and relationship statuses are welcome here.
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To keep the container tight and safe, we cap the group at 30. We also have a minimum number we need to run the event, so you can trust you'll be in good company either way.
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If you're in the acute aftermath of sexual trauma, or you don't yet have a steady support system outside this retreat, deeper one-on-one work may serve you better first. But it isn’t a hard No — we'll talk it through together in your interview and figure out what's genuinely best for you right now. This retreat also isn't a place for someone just looking to hook up. If you're not here to approach your and others’ desires with consciousness, integrity, open-heartedness, and care, it won't be the right fit.
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There are a few sessions that require your participation because we discuss agreements that everyone needs to be present for. These are clearly laid out on Day 1. Everything else at the Temple of Yes is an invitation, never an expectation. Boundaries and consent are taught and prioritized. Each practice will be clearly explained and demonstrated, and you are empowered to participate in a way that honors your Yes and your No. If you’re a No, you can take some alone time, or you are welcome to stay in the communal space and observe.
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We ask all participants to get screened for STIs if it's been more than four months since your last screening. That said, we don't track anyone's status. If you choose to, there will be space to share your STI status with potential play partners before engaging, and we empower every participant to take responsibility for their own health and safety. We'll provide some safer-sex and cleaning supplies, but we encourage you to bring your own supplies of choice.
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No. This is strictly a sober event. No exceptions.
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The retreat is held in Austin, Texas. To honor the intimate nature of the event, we share the exact venue location with those accepted into the retreat.
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We intentionally price The Temple of Yes as affordably as we can while covering the costs of the retreat and compensating our three-person core team fairly, so our capacity to offer scholarships is limited. Our Early Registration Discount is the best way to reduce the cost of attending. We're happy to explore fee-free payment plans upon request. We also offer a small number of work trade positions for returning attendees by invitation only.
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Registration fees are non-refundable, including if you cancel before the retreat begins or leave early. This is not a dip-your-toe-in retreat. We intentionally created an application and interview process so you can ask questions, feel into the fit, and make an informed decision before investing. In the case of illness or another emergency that prevents you from attending, we may allow you to transfer your registration to a future event on a case-by-case basis.
What You’re Really Saying “Yes” to
The truth is, the way we relate to our desires is rarely just about sex.
It's the way we relate to our lives.
Can you tell the truth about what you want? Can you honor your No without abandoning connection? Can you stay with yourself when someone wants something different? Can you remain open when things don't go according to plan?
These are intimacy skills. They're also life skills.
At The Temple of Yes, desire simply becomes the practice ground. As you learn to trust your body, tell the truth, navigate differences, repair ruptures, and receive more fully, something much bigger begins to shift.
You stop abandoning yourself.
And from that place, intimacy becomes richer. Relationships become more honest. Your choices become more aligned. Life becomes more alive.
So that’s what you're really saying Yes to: a deep relationship with your own aliveness, which never stops giving back.
